The Boredom Challenges of Asa and Fish
by Ratlah
Summary: A bunch of one-shots based on a challenge between my cousin and I. Whoever wins each challenge will get to pick next week's challenge. Rated T for possible future violence, swearing, or character death.
1. Challenge Wk 1: Depressing Story Time!

This would be the first in a series of self-made challenges me and my cousin are going back and forth with.

A bunch of one-shots that probably won't do much. If people seem to particularly like one though, I might write another story on it.

This challenge had to fulfill the following:

- Exactly 1,000 words, no more, no less

- At least three sentences and 15 words in a foriegn or dead language (In mine, it's Italian)

- Two main characters chosen by the other person (For me: N. Italy and Sealand)

WARNING: Character Death.

* * *

He was in pain. Not the usual, scraped his knee kind of pain, but a deep hurt he felt all over his body. He could see the injuries he bore. Scrapes, bruises, cuts, burns, and all sorts of markings littered his young skin. Blood covered his sailor's outfit. The young boy looked over across the ocean; he could almost see his big brother's country from where he lay. The thought made him feel lonely, but he was all alone on his almost ruined nation. England wouldn't notice him until it was too late. His phone provided him with no help either; his family wouldn't answer while they were working and Latvia would be too busy helping Russia to answer. There was only one person who he knew would always answer his phone, and they weren't the best of friends. The other nation didn't even acknowledge him as his own country.

He had no other choice though. No one else would be able to talk to him before he was…  
He didn't want to think about that. His battered arm reached for his phone. As he pulled it out he took a small moment to admire it. It had been a gift from his father, and against all odds the small device was still working. He scrolled through his contacts list, looking for the one person he knew would answer him. He reached the name, pushed the button, and waited for the other country to answer.

"Ciao! Chi è questo? Zitto Romano, io sto usando al telefono!" Answered a voice.

"I-Italy..." He forced out.

"Sì? Chi è questo? Perché stai chiamando?" The voice replied.

"T-this is Sealand. "

"Who?"

He nearly cried at that responce. No one would ever recognize him as an official country. Not even now.  
"S-Sealand. E-England's brother. S-Sweden and F-Finland's child."

A slight pause at the other end of the line.  
"Oh Sealand! I'm sorry about that. I'm really tired right now so that's why I cou-"

"I-Italy, l-listen to me. I need you to d-do me a f-favor."

The Italian at the other end finally picked up the seriousness in the younger nation's voice.  
"W-what's wrong Sealand? Are you hurt?"

"That's besides the point. I-I need to know. Will you d-d me a f-favor?"

The Italian wasn't sure what to make of this, but he agreed to it anyways. The Sealand kid sounded like a was in big trouble.  
"Sure Sealand. Anything. What do you need?"

He sighed in relief, knowing that the other country would help him now.  
"C-could you tell E-England that I n-never really h-hated him?"

"S-sure Sealand?" The Italian replied, unsure of what to make of that comment.

"And will you tell L-Latvia... W-will you tell Latvia that he w-will always be my b-b-best friend? A-and to never forget me?"

The older nation was really worried now. It sounded as if this Sealand kid was dyi-

"W-will you? Please?"

"I'll tell him."

"Good. And my parents... P-please tell my p-parents that I l-love them. A-and that I'm s-sorry I didn't get to say it m-myself."

"I-I'll tell them."  
The Italian was concerned. Sealand sounded like he was hurt, and he was asking all these really odd favors of him.  
"Sealand?"

"Y-yes I-Italy?"

"Are you injured Sealand? Are you hurt?"

He gave a feeble laugh. It was really quite funny to him. He had been so worried about the other nation not caring about him, the other nation not caring about what he wanted to say to all the people he'd never see again. He had only the barest glimmer of hope that he would listen to him. It was really funny to him.  
"I-It's nothing for you to worry about I-Italy. I-I'll be fine s-soon."

"Are you sure? You sound li-"

He smiled. He knew he shouldn't be at a time like this, but he just couldn't help it.  
"I-I'm fine Italy. J-just remember t-to t-tell everyone w-what I said."

"I won't forget. I promise Sealand!"

"I-Italy?"

"Y-yes Sealand?"

"W-when I'm gone, do y-you think they will r-remember me as m-my own c-country? No one seems t-to n-notice me n-now, but m-maybe..."

The Italian was figting back tears as he listened to the little nation over the phone. The child was probably dying alone, but somehow he seemed to be braver about facing his death than Italy knew he'd be.  
"They will remember you Sealand. They'll remember your size as if you were Russia, your strength as if you were Germany, your culture as if you were Japan. They'll remember you as your own country or... Or I'll make them remember you! "

Sealand smiled; knowing the words were untrue but unwilling to cast them off as fictions anyways.  
"T-Thank you Italy. "

"Y-you're welcome, Sealand."

"C-Could I ask you one more favor I-Italy?"

"S-sure Sealand. Anything!"  
Italy was fighting back his tears with all of his strength. He would not cry while the child was talking with him.

"C-could you sing me a s-song? L-like big b-brother England used to do w-when I was little."

The Italain could hear the strenghth fading from the young boy's voice. He wanted to cry, but instead he sang. It was a short song, but it was one of the most beautiful one's he knew.  
"Piccola farfalla dammi la mano.  
Dammi la tua mano Lucciola.  
Confortare me come si passa  
Attraverso le porte di bianco."  
He heard a tiny whisper when he finished his song.

"T-thank you... Italy."

After that, there was silence. A deep poisonous silence that cut into him like daggers. He cried, unable to hold his tears in any longer.

Romano rushed to his brother. Something bad had happened, something from the call had made his brother cry. He placed his arm around his brother.

"What happened Feliciano?"

His brother stopped crying. He looked at Romano with watery brown eyes. He opened his mouth and calmly said:

"The angels have taken a great country from us. The strong, brave Sealand now rests."

* * *

My cousin and I are doing the same basic challenges, just with different shows. The way we are doing it is that whoever has the most reviews/favorites/follows on all their challenges collectively gets to name the next one.

In the interest of fairness, her pen name is invisible0one and her set of challenges follows the same title, The Boredom Challenges of Asa and Fish, I suggest you read them both and leave a review for your favorite.

And yes, I am aware that this one is kind of depressing. It's not my usual style, but the English teacher said I needed to try and branch out. So I did fail.

Translations:  
Ciao! Chi è questo? Zitto Romano, io sto usando al telefono:Hello! Who is this? Shush Romano, I am using the phone!

Sì? Chi è questo? Perché stai chiamando: Yes? Who is this? Why are you calling?

Piccola farfalla dammi la mano. Dammi la tua mano Lucciola. Confortare me come si passa Attraverso le porte di bianco.:  
Small butterfly give me your hand. Give me your hand Firefly. Comfort me as we pass, through the doors of white.


	2. Challenge Wk 2:Germany isn't Sweden, GT

Yeah… Asa won last round. Mine was too depressing I guess. Anyways…

Both my cousin and I got bored again rather quickly, so here is the next installment of our friendly challenges, created by yours truly.

250 Words Google Can't Translate

As you can probably guess, the goal of this challenge was to write a short, 250 word, oneshot that Google can't seem translate back and forth between languages.

The requirements of this challenge were:

- 250 original words, no more no less

- When translated by Google to another language (German for me), then back to English, either the meaning had to be changed or it just no longer makes any sense in general.

(i.e. "I don't have a team." translates (in Latin) to "Non enim erat." and then back to English as "She was not.")

- Asa said it has to be a fluff.

The way this one is set up:

First is the original story, before we let Google butcher it.

Second is the supposed translation.

Third is what happens when you take the translation and put it back into English.

WARNING: Germany/Italy 'cuz I could.

* * *

Order. Perfect order.

That was all Germany wanted. If things were in order, he could function. If they were out of order, he would go nearly mad until he had it fixed. You could say he was a little OCD…

That's why it had confused people so much when he had ended up being the Italian's best friend.

Italy was a little less than perfect order. To put it bluntly, the nation was a mess waiting to happen.

Like the other day when he was trying to make pasta, or the one incident with the grenade… Never mind. That's off topic.

Anyways, Germany and Italy were best buddies and no one understood why.

The truth was Germany was lonely. He'll never say it, but you could tell. The Italian made him feel less lonely. His bright personality could light up the room, burning your skin with its radiance. Germany's friend Italy made him feel happy; something normally only felt when he felt he had everything perfect, everything in order. The Italian caused messes, but somehow, some force had granted him the ability to ignore the chaos that Italy made. In Germany's mind, the Italian's messes were order. That sounded crazy, but it was how Germany's head worked.

You might say that Germany was feeling something similar to a crush.

Now you'll probably laugh at this point, writing me off as insane. It's the truth though.

Germany loved his little Italy, and though he'd never tell, Italy loved Germany as well.

In German:

Bestellen. Perfekte Ordnung.

Das war alles, Deutschland wollte. Wenn die Dinge in Ordnung waren, konnte er funktionieren. Wenn sie draußen waren der Ordnung, würde er gehen fast verrückt, bis er hatte es fest. Man könnte sagen, er war ein wenig OCD ...

Deshalb ist es verwechselt hatten die Menschen so viel, wenn er als der italienischen bester Freund geendet hatte.

Italien war ein wenig kleiner als bester Ordnung. Um es klar zu sagen, die Nation war ein Chaos auf uns zukommen.

Wie die anderen Tage, als er versuchte, Pasta, oder einen Vorfall mit der Granate ... Never Verstand zu machen. Das ist off topic.

Sowieso, Deutschland und Italien waren die besten Freunde, und niemand verstand, warum.

Die Wahrheit war Deutschland war einsam. Er wird nie sagen, aber man könnte sagen. Die italienische machte ihn fühlen sich weniger einsam. Seine helle Persönlichkeit könnte erhellen den Raum, brennen Sie Ihre Haut mit ihrer Ausstrahlung. Deutschland Freund Italien machte ihn glücklich, etwas normalerweise nur empfunden, wenn er, er habe alles perfekt, alles in Ordnung war. Die italienische verursacht Kasinos, aber irgendwie etwas Kraft hatte ihm die Fähigkeit, das Chaos, dass Italien zu ignorieren. In Deutschland Verstand, waren die Italiener Kasinos Ordnung. Das klang verrückt, aber es war, wie Deutschland den Kopf gearbeitet.

Man könnte sagen, dass Deutschland fühlte so etwas wie ein Schwarm.

Jetzt werden Sie wahrscheinlich an dieser Stelle lachen, schreibt mich wie verrückt. Es ist die Wahrheit though.

Deutschland liebte seine kleine Italien, und obwohl er nie sagen würde, liebte Italien Deutschland als gut.

Returned To English:

Order. Perfect order.  
That was all that Germany wanted. If things were in order, he could work. When they were out of order, he would almost go crazy, until he had it fixed. You could say he was a little OCD ...  
Therefore, it is confused, people had so much when he finished as the Italian's best friend.  
Italy was a little less than perfect order. To put it bluntly, the nation was a mess waiting to happen.  
Like the other day when he tried to pasta, or an incident with the grenade ... Never mind making. This is off topic.  
Anyway, Germany and Italy were the best of friends, and no one understood why.  
The truth was, Germany was lonely. He will never say, but you could say. The Italian made him feel less lonely. His bright personality could light up the room, burn your skin with its broadcast. Germany Italy friend made him happy, something usually only perceived when he had everything perfect, everything was fine. Had caused the Italian casinos, but somehow a little force of ability, chaos, ignore that Italy. Germany in mind, the Italians casinos were ok. It sounded crazy, but it was, like Germany worked his head.  
You could say that Germany felt something like a swarm.  
Now you'll probably laugh at this point, I write like mad. It's the truth though.  
Germany loved his little Italy, and although he would never say, Italy, Germany loved as well.

* * *

This one isn't part of the challenge, but it's what happened when I was allowed to mess with Google's goof.

Purchase. Perfect order over.  
That was all that Germany did. If things were in order, he could work. When they were out of order, he would walk almost crazy, until he had it determined. You could say He was slightly Shoulders ...  
Therefore, it is confounded, people had so much if he finished as a the Italian's best friend.  
Italian was somewhat lower than perfect order. In order to put it bluntly, the nation been a mess waiting to happen.  
As with the other days when he tried to pasta, and any occurrence the Grenade ... Never understanding to make. Which is off topic.  
Anyway, Germany and Italy the best of friends, and anyone could understand why.  
The truth had Germany was lonely. He will never say, but you could say. Of the Italian made him feel less lonely. Its bright personality could light up the room, burn your skin with her appearance. Germany Italian boyfriend made him happy, something typically just perceived when he had perfect everything, everything was okay. Did cause Of the Italian casinos, but somehow something combustion lack of ability, chaos, ignoring that Italian. Germany Add understanding, the Italians casinos were Regulation. That sounded crazy, but it been, such as Germany been working his head.  
You could say that Germany feeling a kind of swarm.  
Buy now you are likely laughter to take this opportunity, I write like mad. The time the truth of though.  
Germany loved his little Italian, and even though he will never say, Italian Germany loved as a fine.

* * *

Okay, funny story time! I had goofed around while translating it into another language. I tried Latvian for fun, and when I changed it back to English, Germany had turned into Sweden. I then ranted to my cousin for thirty minutes on how they weren't the same countries at all. It was quite silly.

In the interest of fairness, my cousin's version of these challenges can be found under the pen name invisible0one with the same title of 'The Boredom Challenges of Asa and Fish'.

I suggest you read both of our entries for this challenge and leave a review for your favorite, me!


	3. Challenge Wk 3: Fish's Story of Kissing

Whoo! I won last round with that random GerIta fluff. ^_^ I picked this week's challenge.  
THE VERY IMPORTANT RULES I MADE:

-Kissing scene  
-2 Different fandoms  
-100 words or less.

The stats of this story:

Words: 100

Characters/Fandoms: Belarus (Hetalia) and Spy (Team Fortress 2)  
-

"Y-You killed him." Her voice was shaky.

"It was necessary."

"He was the only man I've loved."

"My apologies, mademoiselle. It was not personal."

The Belorussian girl pulled a knife out of her pocket. She pressed the blade against his throat and kissed him deeply and forcefully. She held him and fought him for dominance. It was a short battle. She won. Her tongue tasted his mouth, attempting to enjoy victory. She tasted hate and anger, her tears, and her brother's blood. She pulled away and breathed.

"You stole my brother away from me, предатель, but you still got caught."

And that was my very first kissing scene. I think it's alright, especially considering I've never even held hands with someone before. ^_^  
TRANSLATIONS:

предатель- Spy, Traitor

As always, I suggest you read both my story and invisible0one's entries for this challenge and leave a review for your favorite.  
**DO IT MAGGOTS.**


End file.
